Thursday, March 29, 2018

Suffering Amplifies Our Joy


We have all experienced a head cold. As a teacher, I am particularly susceptible to them since I spend every day around children. They come on suddenly, when out of a clear blue sky we feel that ominous, tickling sensation deep in our sinus cavities, often accompanied by a sneeze or two. For a brief while we convince ourselves that it’s just allergies, or a little dust in our sinuses. We mollify our fragile psyches with false assurances: “it’s not a cold… I’ll be fine.” But the moment inevitably arrives when our nose becomes a faucet and our head a throbbing, pressure cooker. The congestion eventually settles in our chest as we begin the agonizing cycle of coughing, exacerbated by a sore throat.

This is suffering. It strikes unforeseen, sadistically disrupting our daily routines.

There is a moment during every cold where the same thought inevitably crosses my mind: “How on earth could I have taken for granted the wonderful feeling of being able to breathe through my nose, having no congestion, being able to finish a sentence without coughing up a lung.” Suddenly, the simplest blessings, things we take for granted every day, become our heart’s greatest desire. And when the cold finally abates, there follows a day or two where we truly are appreciative of our good health. But that period of gratitude comes and goes all too quickly… until the next cold, that is.

I assume most people can relate to the trials of a head cold. I write about the experience with a healthy dose of hyperbole (in case you couldn’t tell), but the sensation, exaggerated as this account may be, is all too real. A head cold in the grand scheme of things is low on the list of actual tribulations. As terrible as it may seem at the time, it pales in comparison to the true suffering of a terminal illness, the death of a loved one, financial catastrophe, unanswered prayers, unrequited love. These are the experiences that have tortured human existence for time immemorial, leading many to nihilism and misery. No matter what our station in life, no matter the size of our bank role or the strength of our arm, we are all subject to the world-shattering travails of human suffering. Suffering and death are the two great equalizers.

But what if we could eradicate misery? How many of us at different times in our lives have wished it could be so? Imagine a world without suffering, without death. At first glance it seems like Eden reborn, like a perfect utopia. And if it came to be it certainly would feel wonderful… but only for a little while. Eventually however, true Joy would become a distant memory, unattainable. Our greatest achievements would be as straw upon the wind or a single grain of sand upon the seashore. Existence, life, the very act of being itself would cease to possess even the tiniest sliver of meaning.

In truth, it is suffering, imperfection, death and misery that allow us to experience and appreciate the absence of sorrow, the ordinary, the everyday. In the same way that a head cold helps us to value good health; in a much more powerful way death and suffering allow us to treasure life because of its fragility – rather than in spite of it.

There is a scene in the movie Troy where the hero Achilles speaks of the inherent beauty of mortality. He makes the claim that the gods of the Greek pantheon who are immortal and exponentially more powerful than humans, are in fact envious of our humanity. Achilles says:

“The gods envy us. They envy us because we’re mortal, because any moment may be our last. Everything is more beautiful because we’re doomed. You will never be lovelier than you are now. We will never be here again.”

This perspective is certainly cold comfort to anyone in the midst of grief. Grief is inescapable, it is the natural reaction that our body makes in response to tragedy. You could no more prevent grief than you could stop your hair from growing. But for those of us who are not currently struggling through misery, those of us who are in the middle of our seemingly ordinary, day to day humdrums, should take a moment to reflect upon this thought. There is no such thing as an ‘ordinary day.’ Every day is beautiful. Every day is a gift from God. Every day ended, is gone forever. And that is beautiful. Suffering is in our future, death lies ahead, misery waits… But beauty is in the contrast, happiness is in the ordinary, joy is in the now.

“But seek first the kingdom [of God] and His righteousness, and all these things will be given you besides. Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself. Sufficient unto the day, is the evil thereof.” – Matthew 6:33-34

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